I am terribly behind on updating Green and Glass, and to be honest, even had thoughts of abandoning it over the past few weeks. This is not a new theme in my life. Lodged in my parents' basement are dozens of journals and diaries, most of which peter out after a few lengthy, largely mournful, entries. Even as a penpal I was always the first to break off communication, and most of my hobbies have been short-lived affairs.
The common theme across these failed voyages is that burning interest whacks up against inevitably amateur results. I embarked on journals with the desire not just to put my thoughts into words, but to create a work of art. Each entry was, in my mind, a Faberge egg, which would continue to mesmerize future readers (of course I anticipated publication!) with its intricacy and charm.
There was also the six-month love affair with knitting, which yielded three extraordinarily mediocre scarves, two of which I foolishly gifted to others. In fact, I was so mortified by one of these gifts that I replaced it within a week with a professional scarf, and advised my friend to use mine as a dog blanket. I still stand by this advice.
The challenge for me is that I hate practice. I want, and expect to achieve, immediate, impeccable results. This would be fine if I were actually a wunderkind, but like most of us, I'm only OK when I start out. Sometimes I'm even terrible. Where some people seek to learn, I seek to master...on the first try. And so they go, my hobbies and interests, collecting in cupboards and boxes in my parents' home.
My blogging efforts have often gone this way...I am slow to create new posts, for fear that achieving a perfect result will take hours that I don't have or want to invest. I collect ideas, but day after day fail to execute on them. It's a big weakness.
Anyway, this soul-searching exercise aside, I recently realized that if I'm going to do anything new or scary in my life, I will have to reconcile myself with imperfect results. This is not to say that in other areas I've achieved perfection; rather, I've achieved comfort and acceptance of where I am. Wouldn't it be lovely to take that approach--acceptance of the process--to everything in our lives?
All this to say that I've decided not to abandon the blog. I do really love design and lifestyle ideas, and hey, this is my space to experiment and share. Hopefully you haven't given up on me and will stick around. :)
The common theme across these failed voyages is that burning interest whacks up against inevitably amateur results. I embarked on journals with the desire not just to put my thoughts into words, but to create a work of art. Each entry was, in my mind, a Faberge egg, which would continue to mesmerize future readers (of course I anticipated publication!) with its intricacy and charm.
There was also the six-month love affair with knitting, which yielded three extraordinarily mediocre scarves, two of which I foolishly gifted to others. In fact, I was so mortified by one of these gifts that I replaced it within a week with a professional scarf, and advised my friend to use mine as a dog blanket. I still stand by this advice.
The challenge for me is that I hate practice. I want, and expect to achieve, immediate, impeccable results. This would be fine if I were actually a wunderkind, but like most of us, I'm only OK when I start out. Sometimes I'm even terrible. Where some people seek to learn, I seek to master...on the first try. And so they go, my hobbies and interests, collecting in cupboards and boxes in my parents' home.
My blogging efforts have often gone this way...I am slow to create new posts, for fear that achieving a perfect result will take hours that I don't have or want to invest. I collect ideas, but day after day fail to execute on them. It's a big weakness.
Anyway, this soul-searching exercise aside, I recently realized that if I'm going to do anything new or scary in my life, I will have to reconcile myself with imperfect results. This is not to say that in other areas I've achieved perfection; rather, I've achieved comfort and acceptance of where I am. Wouldn't it be lovely to take that approach--acceptance of the process--to everything in our lives?
All this to say that I've decided not to abandon the blog. I do really love design and lifestyle ideas, and hey, this is my space to experiment and share. Hopefully you haven't given up on me and will stick around. :)
2 comments:
I've bookmarked your blog, and check it every few weeks for new posts! You have a wonderful way of writing...very lyrical and smart, without being snooty. And funny! Keep it up. I enjoy reading it and getting a piece of my friend from across the country. :-)
How sweet, Allison! Thank you for the lovely note and support. :)
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